Thursday, December 19, 2013

Dear Mr Coppy

I saw you on the tele last night. You were being interviewed by that nice looking chap on TF1 and you were trying to convince us that come 2017, we (not me) should vote for you because... you'd changed... The journalist took you up on this and asked you one question of interest: why, when your party was in power, did it not implement the 'changes' it says are essential now? And you said, without a hint of shame, that it was because before, there was no urgent need. Actually, you said it the other way round. You said it was because la France is now up against the wall and the flames are licking the furniture.

In other words, your cosy, luxuriously-lined nest is being threatened, and so something must be done. Because, let's face it, Mr Coppy, politicians are like parasites, are they not? You don't agree? Well, let me tell you a story. Are you sitting comfortably? Then I'll begin.

Once upon a time, there was a host nation which was in quite good health. It bounded about making big noises in the world and other host nations paid attention. At times, its stomach rumbled and flared up, and at times, it was weakened and was invaded by dangerous infections like Nazism and its sneakier cousin, Socialism.

Sucking the life blood of the host were parasites. Parasites feed off the host but bring little if any benefit. The parasites on this host were no different. They spoke imperiously to the host from one orifice, but it was as though their words were emitted from another in a malodorous gaseous cloud, and lasted as long with as much effect.

Times were good and the parasites multiplied themselves like rabbits and brought in their mates until the weight of them became such a heavy burden on the host that they decided they needed another, bigger host. They created a big fat host from a number of smaller ones to feed the parasites whose nests needed refurbishing.

Meanwhile, the host was suffering. Its life blood was being sucked dry by the parasites and it was becoming weak and good for nothing. In its weakened state, it became open to infection and foreign disease. The parasites did nothing because their nests were still comfortable, with unlimited supplies of the red stuff. They gorged on it despite seeing that the host was in agony.

The foreign disease encountered nothing to stop it spreading and multiplying. It fed off the flesh of the host resulting in pockets of gangrene, the cells of which invaded the rest of the host and weakened it further.

Eventually, some of the parasites noticed that the life blood they fed off was at risk. It had a funny taste and seemed less abundant. The host was in a desperate state. The parasites argued amongst themselves. Some said they needed to suck more blood to get the host back to health. Others said they needed to fight the disease. No one wanted to admit that they were too great in number and too greedy for the host to support. Their nests were lined, their stomachs were full, they could not understand what had gone wrong.

And so they left the host to die, and flew to their holiday nests in the Bahamas which they had been lining in secret, just in case... The End.

17 comments:

  1. Not a tale I'd want to tell to the grandchildren, unless I want them to have nightmares. Yet they need to be warned since we haven't managed to deal with the infestation.

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    1. The arrogance of the head honcho parasite of the UMP was quite breathtaking. He has no clue about what to do basically because he can do nothing because everything is decided in Europe. So who does he think he's kidding?! Would you buy a used car from that man?

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  2. Great writing, Sarah. *LIKE* I missed this performance - what a shame. I love tuning in to the French equivalent of Jackanory - politicians here tell the best tales, and regularly manage to make the the electorate believe in fairies.
    Last night's star appearance was Mr Hero with his uninspiring floppy attitude. He and Hollande have about as much presence as the care bears on dope.

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    1. Thanks MM. :)
      I saw Mr Hero too and started shouting at the tele. :) The news guy was actually asking some good questions but Mr H was slippin' and slidin' and trying to look sincere as he avoided answering. Grrr!

      I just want to bang their heads together, as my mother said. Bang some sense into them.

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  3. Gosh, they really got your dander up, didn't they? Really brilliant post, I am sure most people will agree with you. A bunch of merchant bankers, the lot of them. They've got a ticket to ride - the gravy train. Ooops, careful it doesn't hit the buffers.

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    1. Thanks Susie, glad you liked it. Yes, they have really pissed me off these politicians who don't give a toss about anyone but themselves. Actions speak louder than words and the proof is in the state of the country and the state of their personal finances!

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  4. Wow, that's honesty, the flames are licking the furniture, totally scary and one I must use on the kids!

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    1. Well, he didn't put it quite like that. He said France is at a crossroads and we have to take the right direction to save our social privileges... He was playing it down, natch. :)

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  5. I didn't see the interview...but your post brought it well to life!

    Grubby bunch, both left and right, happily lining their pockets while demanding sacrifices from people they are already robbing...

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  6. Blimey, that lot sound even worse than their Brit counterparts, which is saying something!

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    1. It's a close run thing. Our present lot are exceptionally bad.

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  7. Will you vote in 2017? As for me, I am very glad to be living in London!

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    1. I can't vote in the prez elections as I'm not French and have no wish to be, especially at the moment. But I will vote in the municipal elections coming up. :)

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  8. Hell fire! And I thought politicians in America were bad.

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