Alfie it ain't

Alfie Pattern, the kid who thought he'd fathered a child at 12 has found out that he is not the dad. No surprise there.

No surprise either to learn that Chantelle had not been telling the truth when she said she was a virgin and that Alfie was her only boyfriend. Unfortunately for her, five other boys came forward and said they had slept with her in her bedroom at night with her mother's knowledge.

It was somewhat surprising then that Chantelle's mum also said that Chantelle was a virgin when she bedded Alfie. The concept of truth is obviously hazy in that family.

So who is the proud father? Another kid of 15, Tyler Barker. He'd suspected it might be him apparently as he'd kept track of when he and Chantelle had slept together. Surprisingly, he did consider the idea of birth control, but assumed Chantelle would take the morning-after pill. There's nothing like experience to teach you bitter lessons. He now regrets he ever met her.

I'm sure they can all take heart in the knowledge that they've all become celebrities, however. This is something which some people seem to strive for despite having no creative talent. These days you don't need talent, you just need to be infamous. I'm sure Alfie has a great future ahead of him appearing on reality shows of varying crassness.

Chantelle is less fortunate. She's now known for being the National Slut which makes her very upset, but hey, you can't have everything, can you? I'm sure The Sun is keeping her in condoms and nappies nicely, so a little infamy is nothing compared to all the attention and national celebrity, is there?

And I expect that Maisie will grow up just like her mother, as Chantelle is like hers. RDV in 15yr's time...

Poor Alfie

In the story of young parents Chantelle and Alfie, I cannot be the only one who is harbouring a nasty suspicion that Chantelle's mother, Mrs Steadman, has been manipulating her daughter and Alfie Pattern from the start.

Chantelle is 15 and Alfie 13, and he is supposed to be the father of her daughter, Maisie who was conceived when Alfie was only 12.

What makes my flesh creep is that Mrs Steadman knew her daughter was having sex with other boys, even supposedly catching her at it, although she denies this hotly. Despite the fact that her daughter was sexually active, Alfie was allowed to stay over regularly at her house, sleeping in Chantelle's room, and even keeping a school uniform there.

Chantelle, who, tragically, must be gaining the reputation as the biggest slut in England, had sex with Alfie too, inevitably I suppose, although they don't know for sure that Alfie is the father.

So, if Chantelle's mum knew that her daughter was sexually active, and encouraged Alfie to sleep with her, it could only be because she wanted everyone to think that the baby was fathered by the youngest boy. She would know that this would result in huge publicity, and, by consequence, huge amounts of money.

The whole business makes me think of Shannon Matthews and her evil mother who had her 'kidnapped' for financial gain. Mrs Matthews got eight years in jail.

Chantelle's mum seems to have actively encouraged her daughter's pregnancy and then spread the rumour that Alfie must be the father despite the fact that he was only 12 when they had sex. Doesn't it seem fishy? Six other boys have come forward as potential fathers to the baby, all older than Alfie and all saying they had sex with Chantelle around about the time the baby was conceived.

Alfie will be opening the DNA paternity test in front of the cameras. Poor kid. How exploitative can you get? Is this what modern parenting has sunk to? His parents should be protecting him, not throwing him to the lions! Formerly, kids from deprived families were sent out to work and went down the mines, up chimneys and into the mills. We thought we had moved on from those terrible times. Now though, they are kidnapped or practically prostituted and then exploited for publicity and huge financial gain.

One wonders how many other hard-faced weasel old bats are plotting the use of their children in some sordid tale to be used and abused by the tabloids in exchange for celebrity status and loads of dosh. Mrs Matthews is serving time. If Mrs Steadman is guilty of deliberately lying about Alfie's paternity for financial gain, I hope she also goes down for fraud. They would have a lot to chat about in prison, she and Mrs M...